Patricia Ann Calonder's Obituary
Patricia Ann Calonder was born on May 30, 1940, to Rudolph Garfield Wells and Betty Louise Luxton, and though she was a Sacramento native who would settle in the area, she started her life a world traveler. Her father was a military man who, along with his family, which would grow to include daughter Judy, and son John, was frequently moved from base to base, where Patricia underwent a vigorous education in living abroad. Of all the places she lived, however, none stuck in her memory more than Guam. She often recounted how “the spiders were as big as dinner plates” and how, once, a bumblebee “the size of an orange” stung her while she ran barefoot through a field of sugar cane. She was not fond of Guam.
After graduating from St. Francis High School in Sacramento, she married Richard Calonder, and moved to Citrus Heights, where she would spend the remainder of her life. In the ensuing years, Patricia was a devoted and attentive mother to her children, and, if they are to be believed, filled her spare time perfecting the craft of the poet:
“David, David, smart and able,
Get your elbows off the table.
This is not a horse’s stable,
But a first class dining table.”
In her early thirties, Patricia reinvented herself. While attending college, she waited tables and continued to raise her children. She soon secured a job at McClellan Air Force Base, where she worked as a Logistical Support Specialist until her retirement.
Though she enjoyed novels and movies (especially westerns), her love was the theater, and she was proudest when she acquired season tickets to the Music Circus. In fact, she owned nearly every classic musical on vinyl. House cleaning was often conducted to the sound of “I Feel Pretty” or “If I Were a Rich Man.” But it never precluded a fondness for other types of music, and she could enjoy Neil Diamond and the Scorpions without contradiction.
Patricia was a devoted companion and caregiver during her mother’s final years, and the two could often be seen daubing cards at the bingo parlor or slipping nickels into slot machines in Reno. In fact, it was her mother who instilled in Patricia a love of games, especially cards, and she cajoled player after player into learning canasta even as her former opponents lay defeated behind her. Some might say, though, that her opponents just played so they could eat some of her famous spinach dip, the recipe for which remained a much-coveted prize.
Even in illness she found joy. She’d arrive to oncologist appointments with her four grown children in tow, and beam with pride when the staff would refer to her as “Pat and her entourage.” Whenever a paper needed signing or an appointment needed making, she would, with a flourish and wave of her hand, say: “You’ll have to speak to my daughter. She handles all of my affairs now.” In her final days, she glowed as she recounted how a handsome hospice nurse half her age admired her blue eyes: “He said, ‘if I didn’t have a wife…’”
After a hard-fought battle with lung cancer, Patricia passed away peacefully at her home in Citrus Heights on Friday, August 16, 2013, surrounded by her family, the way she always wanted. She was 73 years old and is preceded in death by her parents and her brother John Wells.
Patricia is survived by her sister Judy Meyers and her children: David (Valerie) Calonder of Yuba City; Chris Calonder of Yuba City; Kathy (Dean) Ailor of Citrus Heights; and Paul (Laura) Calonder of Sacramento. She was grandmother to Steven (Violet) Crispo, Harley Calonder, Tiffany Calonder, and Taylor Gardner; and great grandmother to Calleigh and Mackenzie Crispo.
After retirement, Patricia rediscovered her love for travel, but instead of a military transport, she found cruise ships more to her liking. There will be a graveside service at 11 am on Wednesday, August 21, 2013, to see her off on her final cruise. Just no stops in Guam. Have you heard about the spiders there?
In lieu of flowers please send donations to Sutter Hospice in Roseville (suttercareathome.org)
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